Tagged: Citizenship Questions

Proposed U.S. Citizenship Test Questions! What is a woman?

This is the last in my series of proposed U.S. Citizenship questions. As always, I’m going to give you first the average British answer to each question, just to show what an uninitiated, unassimilated person would say, and then the real answer. Previously: What is Cream Cheese served with? How many bathrooms does the average family house need? and How do you make a cup of tea?

Question: What is a woman?

Foreigner’s answer:

Wow, that’s a complicated question! The simplest answer is that women are one half of the world’s population. And I guess the biological definition could be that women are people who have two X chromosomes, or who have female genitals and secondary sexual characteristics like boobs.

But we aren’t defined by our biology alone, and the social definition of gender is always historically and culturally specific.

The safest definition is probably a woman is someone who identifies as a woman. Which might sound circular, but that’s ok! Gender, like everything in our life, is ‘remade’ every time we enact it.

That said, it doesn’t exist in a power vacuum, right? So we can also acknowledge that what it means to be a woman depends on our other intersecting identities. Cis-women, heterosexual women, white women, adult women, and middle or upper class women are less likely to have their gender policed or called into question.

U.S. Citizen’s answer:

A woman is a uterus that sometimes acts as if it had a mind of its own.

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Proposed U.S. Citizenship Test Questions! Tea Time.  

In this new series of posts, I am proposing questions that I think ought to be on the U.S. citizenship test. For each question, I’ll first give you the average British person’s answer, just to show what an uninitiated, unassimilated person would say. Then the Gringo’s response with my explanation. Previously: What is Cream Cheese Served With? How Many Bathrooms Should a Family House Have?
tea cup

My mum has these cups. That’s about her level of stewed, too.

Question: How do you make a cup of tea?

(British) Foreigner’s answer:

Normal tea or posh tea? Posh tea involves blah blah blah whatever, you can find someone pedantic to fight about it with at a dinner party if you like.

But normal tea requires just boiling water, proper tea in a teabag, milk, a biscuit, and the correct mug.

Using the wrong mug will can cause unpardonable offense. Don’t do that.

Otherwise the big secret is: you honestly can’t go wrong.

U.S. Citizen’s answer:

You’re doing it wrong.

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Proposed U.S. Citizenship Test Questions! How many bathrooms is enough bathrooms?

In this new series of posts, I will be proposing questions that I think ought to be on the U.S. citizenship test. For each question, I’ll first give you the average British person’s answer, just to show what an uninitiated, unassimilated person would say. Then the Gringo’s response with my explanation. Previously: What is Cream Cheese Served With?

Aspirational bathroom

This bathroom is bigger than my apartment.

Question: How many bathrooms does the average family home need?

Foreigner’s answer:

One upstairs, and a downstairs loo if you’re posh.

U.S. Citizen’s answer:

Oh wow, well at least one bathroom per person living in the house, plus an extra bathroom for non-blood relations, obviously. Actually make that two extras, just to be on the safe side. Or you know what? Let’s say 2.5 bathrooms per every other room in the house. That might be enough. (Should we put a little bathroom inside the master bathroom? Is that ok? I feel like that’s ok.)

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Proposed U.S. Citizenship Test Questions! Let’s talk Cream Cheese.

In this new series of posts, I will be proposing questions that I think ought to be on the U.S. citizenship test. For each question, I’ll first give you the average British person’s answer, just to show what an uninitiated, unassimilated person would say. Then the Gringo’s response with my explanation. Bubble sheets ready? Here goes! 

Patriotic Cream Cheese Stuffed Strawberries.

Patriotic Cream Cheese Stuffed Strawberries.

Question 1. What is cream cheese served with?

Foreigner’s answer:

Cream cheese… Hm. Is that the stuff from those Philadelphia adverts in the ‘90s? It’s like a diet thing, right? A sandwich spread for people who hate themselves.

So I guess bread. Yeah. I mean, if you really have to eat it, I guess you’d serve it on bread.

U.S. Citizen’s answer:

EVERYTHING.

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